The Culture Challenge Every Leader Faces Today

What does it take to build organizations where people truly thrive?
In this episode of Building Leadership Community, Coach Dora Mendez sits down with Stephan Spilkowitz, Director of Engagement and Culture at Westchester Jewish Community Services, nonprofit trailblazer, and organizational culture consultant. Together, they explore inclusive leadership, wellness in the workplace, community building, and how leaders can support people at scale without losing humanity or purpose.

In this Episode:
00:00 Introduction & episode overview
02:42 Leadership, wellness, and responsibility
04:52 Stephan’s leadership journey
09:20 Service, fun, and organizational culture
13:27 Wellness, burnout, and leadership sustainability
19:40 What community really means
21:45 Advice for the next generation of leaders
26:50 How to connect with Stephan
29:49 Final reflections & closing

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About Coach Dora Mendez - https://coachdoramendez.com
The mission of Coach Dora LLC is to be a beacon of bold authenticity, igniting conversations on diversity, equity, and inclusion through my writing and public speaking. I envision a world where everyone feels empowered to lead with courage and compassion, and my coaching and consulting services are the tools to make this vision a reality.

Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:00

Welcome back, amazing leaders, to another powerful episode of season three, Building Leadership Community Podcast. I'm your host, Coach Dora Mendez, and today's conversation is one you absolutely need to hear. We're diving deep into what it truly means to create a culture where people don't just show up, they thrive, where inclusion isn't a buzzword, but a lived experience, where 600-plus employees across 23 locations feel connected, valued, and empowered to reach their full potential. Our guest today is doing exactly that work, and he's been recognized for it. Joining us is Stefan Spilkowitz, executive leader, board member, organizational, culture architect, and recent honoree as a nonprofit trailblazer by City and State Magazine. By the end of this conversation, you will walk away with actionable strategies to transform your workplace culture, a deeper understanding of what inclusive leadership truly requires, and the inspiration to lead with intention, empathy, and impact. This episode is your blueprint to build organizations where people flourish, not just function. So settle in, take a breath, and get ready. Hello and welcome to Building Leadership Community Podcast. I'm your host, Dora Mendez. I am the founder and CEO of Coach Dora LLC. Our guests will be entrepreneurs, small business owners, and community leaders that drive social impact. It can be lonely at the top, but it doesn't have to be. It can be lonely at the top, but it doesn't have to be. This is why we started the podcast. If you are new to Building Leadership Community, we are so glad that you're here. Please don't forget to like, share, and subscribe so you never miss an episode. And if you're watching on YouTube, hit that bell button at the bottom of the screen so you get notified when new episodes drop. Say hi in the comments, reread them, and we respond. And so we love to hear from you. Before we dive into today's conversation, I want to take a moment to speak directly to the leaders listening right now. If you're someone who carries responsibility, vision, and ambition, and you're also quietly aware that your well-being has been living on the back burner. I want you to know this. You're not broken and you're not alone. That's exactly why I created Coach Door's Wellness Club. This isn't just another membership, it's a monthly sanctuary for leaders who want to take care of themselves without dimming their drive or lowering their standards. Inside the Wellness Club, we gather once a month for live wellness sessions where we slow things down just enough to get clear. We'll work with journaling prompts, stress management tools, and leadership reflections you can actually use in real life. You'll also get exclusive coaching around AI fluency for leadership and wellness, helping you stay future ready while protecting your energy and focus. And just as important, you'll be part of a private community of leaders who truly get it. No performative self-care, no hustle culture guilds, just thoughtful people navigating growth together. Each month, we'll also explore simple practical well-being challenges designed to fit into real schedules and real leadership lives. If you're ready to lead with clarity, steadiness, and intention, I'd love to welcome you into this space. You can learn more about Coach Dora's Wellness Club in the description below. Now, let's get into today's episode. Let me tell you how I met our guest, Stefan. In June of 2025, we were on a panel together. It had a technical title, Creating Wellness for Nonprofit and Monitoring Population Health. We had a lovely time really sharing about how we support wellness and people who are doing amazing work in human services and in the nonprofit space. Let me tell you more about Stefan's amazing work. He is the Director of Engagement and Culture at Westchester Jewish Community Services, WJCS, Westchester's largest provider of outpatient community mental health services. In this role, he leads the charge in creating an exceptional employee experience for over 600 staff members across 23 locations, ensuring that every single person feels included, connected, valued, and supported to reach their full potential. With 14 plus years of multifaceted experience across mental health, human service, and environmental nonprofits, Stefan brings a wealth of knowledge to the table. He also serves as vice chairman of the board for groundwork in the Hudson Valley, an environmental social justice nonprofit, and is deeply engaged in the nonprofit sector through nonprofit Westchester and federal advocacy work with the Network of Jewish Human Services Agencies Advocacy Committee. What does this guy not do? Recently, City and State magazine recognized him as a nonprofit trailblazer. And once you hear him speak, you will understand why. You'll fall in love with him just like I did. Stefan is also an organization development consultant and co-founder of ECLAT Culture. I'll make sure he pronounced that uh uh again in case I got that wrong, um, with his wife, Camilla Knight. He holds a BA in psychology from Cornell University and an MA in organizational psychology and change leadership from Columbia University. Today, Stefan is here to share his insights, his strategies, and his leadership wisdom with you all. Let's bring him to the stage.

SPEAKER_00 7:15

Hi, Dora. How are you? Thank you so much for having me on and for your kind words. That introduction was was um was incredible. Thank you.

SPEAKER_01 7:26

Uh, I meant every word of it, and that's why you're here today. We had such a fun time when we we we didn't know each other before, and it was as if we did, as if we knew each other forever. We had we share similar philosophies when it comes to wellness and people and culture. And uh we we both uh share that in common that we've dedicated our careers to helping people, to serving people. And we also work with our spouses. Can you um I I'm not sure if I I pronounced it correctly. Can you share the name of the um company you uh work with your your wife with?

SPEAKER_00 8:07

Sure, happy to. It's uh eclat culture, which means uh star culture or shining culture in French, actually. Um, and and I should also correct uh my wife's name uh name is pronounced Camila, and she does not miss a beat in terms of she she gets Camilla most of the time, but but she's she's quick on the correction there. Um but she's a great partner in life and with work uh as well. She's uh she herself is a DEI and human resource professional, so we kind of bring the the HR and the organization development work together, and and we've worked with uh nonprofits, business entities, and um really just trying to help people and and teams reach their full potential.

SPEAKER_01 8:47

Well, so we have that in common. As you know, the producer of this podcast is my spouse, Dylan Rogers. He likes to stay in the in the wings. Um, so working with your spouse uh has its challenges, but somehow we figured it out, right? Um so um let's uh I could talk to you about so many things, but let's get right to what we uh ask all our guests if you can share with our listeners and our viewers a bit about your leadership story.

SPEAKER_00 9:20

Sure, I'm happy to. So throughout my leadership journey and professional journey, there's been two things that have been fairly constant um service and fun. And it goes back to my very first leadership opportunity, uh, which is in my college days when I was philanthropy chair of my fraternity. So that was my first opportunity to step into any kind of a leadership role, and I wanted it to mean something and to do good for others. And from there, I went on to uh to recruitment, the Rush chair, and and was involved in in party planning, but also with uh uh you know an element of really ensuring that people enjoyed their time in joining our organization because it was a community, it was friends, but at the end of the day, it was also an organization. Um beyond that, I went on to uh work in the mental health field uh since I have always been fascinated and interested and dedicated towards people. Um and uh I worked, I started working at Andres, a large mental health uh nonprofit serving youth who had experienced early childhood trauma. And pretty quickly I gravitated towards recreation therapy and developing programs that were uh that I saw had the potential to really give children who had had a really difficult experience and an amazing uh new experience. And uh I ran programs that range from aquatics to a motivational youth dirt bike program, high and low ropes course, uh animal assisted therapy, uh, a therapy dog program in addition to that, um, student council, uh recording studio program. And I always forget something, but uh suffice to say, ran a variety of programs that really sought to do both of those things, right? Provide um for a fun, engaging, empowering experience, but also was deeply rooted in service and helping people. Uh my interest started to evolve from there as I uh found myself in leadership roles and really seeing the potential for the potential for service at a large scale once you work effectively with leading a team, empowering a team, and really empowering a whole system to function effectively. Uh, and so I started to get interested in culture, especially trauma-informed culture, working in the mental health space, and went back to school for organizational psychology and change leadership. And uh, through the course of that program and the years that followed, uh, found myself in my current role at WJCS, where I have the privilege and the pleasure of supporting uh over 600 staff in the life-changing work that they do for over 20,000 clients throughout the county of all walks of life, all backgrounds. And I'm really a believer in that philosophy of you take care of the people who are on the front lines delivering care, and everyone benefits. So, in that in my current role, where you know, that's how I see my service to others, my service to to the staff of our organization. And of course, the fun is not lost, right? Whether it's our holiday parties, some raffles, some masseuses at our um summer barbecue, and uh and well, as soon as, oh, wait, wait, uh, you gotta invite me to this party. Well, go ahead, go ahead. Yeah, I mean, and listen, that's it. We all spend so much time at work. We deserve to have a little bit of fun along the way. And, you know, we think about why we do what we do. It's to to elevate, to serve, and to to help improve others, especially those most in need. So that's been a little bit about my my journey. And it's taken a couple twists and turns um as I follow things that are that are interesting or um impactful. Those are my my two drivers right there. What's what's interesting and impactful. Um, but that core element that's kind of followed me throughout is service and fun.

SPEAKER_01 13:27

So I I want to pick up on something that you mentioned about serving others. And I mentioned that I started a wellness club, right? And so and I love maybe I'm taking advantage of your expertise, but what do you do to take care of yourself? You're giving so much to others, and you know, you 20,000 clients, 600 staff, you're giving so much to others. What do you do to take care of yourself?

SPEAKER_00 14:01

Yeah, thank you, Dora. Um, I think it's essential, you know, and especially those in leadership roles, you you're holding not only for yourself, but you're holding for others, you know. Add to that, I'm I'm a dad. So, you know, first and foremost, my my bosses are my little people running around at home. And I don't get quite as much time as I used to, but I I still carve out some time to make sure. Uh one, I love to find myself in nature, uh, feel really um uh connected when I am uh hiking in the woods or if I'm out on the water, I'm a sailor. Uh so again, something I don't get quite as much time as I used to to enjoy. Um, but I do sail, um, do ride motorcycles as well. I'm a little bit of an adrenaline junkie, which is something that's also followed me. Um, but that's something that I I, you know, uh I found myself kind of five um falling into a bit of a flow state, you know, um kind of being one with with the bike and the road or one with uh boat and the wind. Uh and uh, you know, as we find ourselves in colder days now, looking forward to hopefully getting on the ski slopes for at least a couple days on my snowboard. So those are those are some things that I that really kind of fill my cup. Um and outside of that, I I just love spending time with with my kids, with my dog. He barks a lot, but he's a great little pup. And um, yeah, I think it's it's you know, it's critical to prioritize wellness for yourself, even when it feels like uh uh a nice to have or you don't have time for it, you have to remind yourself that um that it's critical, right? You know, I think about the um the analogy of the oxygen mask on an airplane, right? And what are the instructions you get with an oxygen mask? It's always to put it on yourself first, because if you're not helping yourself, you you really can't be in a position to help others. Uh I I agree.

SPEAKER_01 16:06

And I um uh I have I have we have uh 11-year-old and a nine-year-old. So uh I put the I put them first often. Like if if we were ever in accident, my instinct would be to put the mask on them first because that's just always how I am. But uh we do have to put the mask on ourselves. If we can't help, if we're not well, we can't help others. So thank you for elevating that.

SPEAKER_00 16:36

Yeah. And I just want to say, Dora, that you know, that instinct, I mean, that's that's an understandable instinct, right? As a parent. And truth be told, I would probably do the same thing in that situation. But that's, you know, the perfect kind of metaphor for why it's important to be intentional about wellness, right? And that's, you know, whether you're providing a wellness program to staff, which is often seen as, okay, that's nice to have, but you know, we're busy, we have a lot of work to do, and then there's other critical benefits and one thing or another, but it's about a mindset shift to really kind of dedicate yourself to a practice of wellness that ensures that you're you're well functioning. You know, I'll give you another metaphor there. You know, if you have a car that, you know, is just on the go constantly and you're not gassing up, you're not paying attention to the oil level, and you're not paying attention to that check engine light, eventually you're gonna break down. And then you're gonna be forced to tend to the wellness, so to speak, of that vehicle. And we're we're the same. So, you know, being proactive there, I think is essential.

SPEAKER_01 17:43

But I feel like um, because of your line of work, you work with with um, you know, I feel like it's even more important to sort of practice what you preach because you're helping people with their mental health and their uh traumas, and you're supporting people. Um, and I think it's important to practice what you preach, and I think that's why your role um is not a nice to have, it is essential. Um also for burnout, just like for practical, from a practical point of view, as like an employer in a business, um, you don't, you don't, if people stay and people do their best work when they feel valued and supported and making sure their wellness and having a role. I mean, I feel like your role is so unique. I don't think that that's there are a lot of organizations that even have that specific role. It's usually relegated to HR. Like when I I spent many years in HR for nonprofits, and it and it's like relegated. Um and so I think it's it just speaks volumes to your organization to have a role that's really intentional about wellness and really practicing what is preached and walking in the walk and talking the talk. Um, so that being said, in terms of organization, because you you know you you specialize in organizational development, but this is a question that could be answered in many ways. And I'd love to get your um perspective on what on what community means and what it means to you. You have such expertise on organizational development, but I'd love to hear, you know, however you like to answer it, what does community mean to you?

SPEAKER_00 19:40

So community means a lot of things, but if I were to boil it down to one word, I would say potential. Because there is so much possible when you bring people together, especially a diverse array of people, different walks of life, different backgrounds, different perspectives in terms of what collaboration can look like, mutual support can look like. And essentially, you know, I'm a big believer that you know the whole is greater than the sum of its parts, and that whether it is um, you know, working on a work-related idea or solving a uh or or even you know, parenting. There's community and just uh just uh partners being together, it's always better to get at it with some help, right? We can all we all need help at certain times, and we can all be helpful to others at certain times. And having a community means having a base, a resource, um, and really uh a set of trusted individuals to call on as life's works challenges just arise. So, you know, I think there's there's so much potential in community. You never really know that what you can fully do. Um, but the more you lean in, the more you build networks, the more you build community, the more you can help connect the dots, whether that's you and somebody else or two people in your orbit who would really benefit from being connected with one another.

SPEAKER_01 21:16

I love that. I love that. Uh community uh is possibilities are possibilities. I love that. Um and so um it's a great segue um to advice. Um what advice would you give to the next generation of leaders? Um, maybe something that you would you know tell your younger self.

SPEAKER_00 21:45

Sure. I would say start with why, then figure out how. So, with regard to start with why, know what drives you, know what vet what you value, um, what kind of things you enjoy as it Pertains to work, what kind of things you really don't like as well. Um, and what's meaningful, right? There's so many causes or motivators or things that can serve as drivers for folks, and it varies from person to person. So knowing your why, I would say, is square one. And then turn in terms of the how, there's so many ways to get there. I I once read a book that um reframed the idea of a uh career ladder uh into the idea of a climbing wall. And I loved that analogy because it's so true. You know, at times the path is not linear, right? And sometimes a side project or even a lateral move or um a stretch assignment might be that thing that can help you progress upward in your career. And then also we have to acknowledge and and respect that not everyone wants to perhaps climb the ladder in the traditional sense, right? In terms of just rate right rising in the hierarchy. And some really enjoy just being masters of their craft, right? And amassing perhaps new modalities. I think about some of the clinicians and therapists I work with who are nothing short of miracle workers, honestly and truly. And there are so many interesting therapeutic modalities that they can um upskill themselves with, and people are complicated. Uh that is not easy work. And I remember that back when I was a uh a paraprofessional working with um boys on the autism spectrum. You know, there's a lot going on there. And so, you know, whatever your craft is, whatever your path is, there's more than one way to get there. I and and I'll share uh a vocab word that I learned in grad school, which really captures that, which is equifinality. So, you know Equifinality, equifinality, which means exactly that. There's more than one way to get there. I love that.

SPEAKER_01 24:05

I love that because leadership isn't always uh climbing up. Um it's it could be learning and grow continuously growing and learning and improving. Um, I once had someone I, you know, with my HR hat, speaking of not wanting to climb up, I had someone who reached out to me. I had a job of posting, and someone from a colleague from a long time ago who I loved and loved to work with reached out to me and said, I'm I'm interested. And I said, But you're so overqualified. And and they said, I don't want the stress of managing other people. I really, I really just I like helping people, I like being in a support position. I I feel like there's too much pressure and stress. And she was really content in in staying in her level as long as she was uh challenged um in terms of continuously learning something new. And um uh I I ended up hiring her. Um, and I wouldn't have if she had just reached out because I would have, I've been, I would have been, I was worried. You worry when people um have so much experience and are so good at what they do. And that was their path for success. That's how the way they they led. They and um so I love that analogy of you know finding the why and the how um and what worked for you because leadership means um different things to different people, it's not just a dot job title. Um, and so and I love how you talk about clinicians and how complex their jobs are, that like climbing like up in in the hierarchy isn't growth for them. It's really learning and really um understanding the complexities of the role that they're in is is uh satisfaction uh alone. Uh, I just love that concept. I don't think anyone has brought that really up um in our uh on our show. So I'd love to toss it back to you and to ask you to share what um how people can get in touch with you, learn more about your organization, the work that you do. What what what would you like our uh audience to to know about you and how to um you know get involved?

SPEAKER_00 26:50

Sure. Um well getting back to community. I'm always interested in building community and and again the the interest that led me to psychology in the first place, just a fashion fascination with people and especially what's possible in groups. So I'm happy to connect with anyone who um perhaps wants to find me on LinkedIn. Name is spelled just like you see below. Uh so that's probably the best way to reach me. Um whether um there's a potential collaboration, whether my wife and I through our through our uh a Cloud Cult Cheer can maybe be helpful to you and your teams, um, or simply to to chat. Uh, you know, I'm always happy to do that. And and I also wanted to share um that uh, you know, I I'm not sure when this episode will air, but right now it's it's 2025 is winding down. And this has been a tough year, especially for nonprofits, just with everything that's been going on um in the country and and you know, getting back to why and what drives you, I encourage everyone to think about you know, what's a cause that's meaningful to you? And it might be something you're currently engaged in, or maybe something you haven't found yet. Find that cause and support, contribute whatever you can. Um, because it's the work of the nonprofit sector is critical, not just for uplifting some of the most vulnerable, but also just simply ensuring that that everyone's well taken care of. You know, I'm a big philosophy on, you know, rising tide lifts all boats and and uh you know, uh big on service and impact. So that's why I've found myself a home in the nonprofit sector. And especially with uh a time of increasing need and reducing resources, um, the more we can find community together and support uh organizations and causes which are meaningful and doing impactful, important work, the more we all benefit at the end of the day.

SPEAKER_01 28:53

Stefan, thank you for that. Thank you for lifting that up. Audience and viewers, uh do what you can um to support the most vulnerable in our communities. So thank you so much. We're gonna make sure that the links that you discussed are in the description of this episode. Um, to our listeners and our viewers, you'll have access to that. Um, and we'll let you know when the episode airs so you can definitely spread that wonderful message of support for the nonprofit community. Uh Stefan, thank you so much for being here. We're so thrilled. We um are we know that folks are gonna get so much out of listening to you today, learning about your story, learning about how to support um people in wellness. So we we're just so grateful to you. Thank you so much.

SPEAKER_00 29:49

Well, thank you, Dora. And if I could have just one minute, I have one more important shout out. Um, and that's to you and uh the wellness community that you are building. It sounds amazing. And again, that kind of thing, it's not a nice to have. It really is a need to have. So I encourage all the listeners today to really check out um that wellness community. I'm interested to learn more myself and take care of yourself. You know, there's life is stressful, but you know, we all deserve to have some fun too. Thank you.

SPEAKER_01 30:22

Fun. That is it. Uh, you know, you just when you said life is stressful, we all deserve to have some fun. It took me back to Ferris Bueller. I don't know that maybe I'm aging myself. Um, life moves fast. Um, anyway, so I want to thank you, Stefan. Thank you for that shout out. Thank you for being here. I'm gonna ask you to hold on a second while we roll our closing credits um to our audience and our viewers listening out there. Don't forget to like, share, and subscribe. Um, especially if you know someone who needs to hear um what we have to say about wellness. Um, please don't forget to like, share, and subscribe. Stefan, thank you again. And hold hold a moment while we roll our credits. You've been listening to Building Leadership Community. Watch on YouTube at CoachDora M. Listen wherever you get your podcast. Follow me on LinkedIn, Instagram, and YouTube at Coach Dora M. Visit me on the web at coachdora mendez.com. Hosted by me, Dora Mendez. Produced by Dora Mendez and Dylan Rogers. Graphics, editing, and sound mixing by Dylan Rogers.